Tuesday, February 23, 2016

finding the beautiful...

In all those years as children, growing up, we have the adults around us to protect us, to polish the path for us so that we may lead our journey unharmed, uninterrupted and untouched by any negative encounters, they try to teach us to avoid the messy bits and periods. Then we become these adults and we try to do the same to ourselves. We envision our journey and we hold unto it. We build walls to use as shields for protection, so that we may purposefully stick to that determination.

But you know what? Messy, weird and confusing times will come. And you can do nothing to avoid them. Aiming to teach yourself to be able to stand on solid ground at all times is not only impossible, but also stupid. Essentially you'd want to become a boulder, to stand firm. And to avoid life. In the end, by wishing to avoid the mess means, wishing to avoid life.

How many times have you found yourself with a whirlwind of emotions to sort through and a novel-worth of unanswered questions to ask?

Most of my love comes from my mess. Those rough periods, the doubts, the guilt, the shaky ground and moving sand, the rollercoasters. The sleepless nights and long jogging sessions. The mistakes, the incosistencies and the not-good-enoughs. Then those cleansing tears, the timeless silence and the uplifting void. It is a journey. It offers progress. It gives life a new breath.  It fills the heart with gratitude which transforms every molecule within into love.
You have to let everything fall apart, before you can understand what is steadfast in your soul.

The darker it is, the brighter the stars shine.

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