Saturday, October 15, 2016

Seeing people for who they are

Sipping tastefully bitter yarrow tea, I am pondering what I loved about last night the most. Was it the gratitude my heart was gradually warming into with every next step I took in the neighborhood park covered in the soft darkness of the night, feeling so, so very safe. Or was it the moment I turned the corner, adding an extra lap to my jogging routine, when I faced the -almost full- Hunter's moon just as it has lit up the path of an airplane steadily following its course. I imagined those up there in the air, flying to meet people they love or heading to places they have never been, their expectant hearts, the excitement in every cell of their body... I could, for one moment, feel part of that excitement, that joy, that light in looking forward to something new.

Earlier that morning I went to the post office to ship Jasmin Blanc orders, before taking Sziszi to the Vet. When I entered the room I saw the only employee I have always had a hard time connecting with in the past (to be very diplomatic in the manner I express our relationship). She is not a regular, she is just called to fill in, when someone from the service team is on holiday or on a sick leave.
I was standing in the doorway, feeling the sudden urge to turn around, leave, and come back in the afternoon when the later shift comes. I had one hand on the door handle, then stopped and made my way back to the queue. I closed my eyes for a moment.

Right there I had the opportunity to grow. And this recognition was sharp and vivid in my mind's eye.
The choice between walking away and facing the challenge was equally there, and while walking away has often been the path of least resistance, I could feel that in that very moment it was no longer the case. So I took the time I was offered by waiting in the rather long line to make peace with my decision, and expect nothing short of a pleasant encounter keeping in mind that those we interact with are a mirror, reflecting our emotions back to us.
Based on previous life experiences we often make the mistake of expecting a new situation to unfold according to past scripts when people or circumstances repeat themselves in our present... But when we commit to consciously detach ourselves from the perceived reality of life and allow space for more than that which we expect to happen is when events start taking a new course, it is when that which we like to call "miracle" starts to suddenly appear in our least guarded moments.

I smiled at her. Handed her the packages, we had a random chit-chat, she was lovely enough to look for a package I was to receive, but had no notification to show for it, then I paid the receipt, thanked her for her kindness, we wished each other a great day and I went on loving the crisp air and rusty leaves on the sidewalk. Just like that!

So next time someone behaves like a bitch to you, ask yourself what it was within you that might have mirrored that kind of behaviour...? I am by no means trying to make you feel guilty. Look at it as an opportunity to grow, to take responsibility for your words and your actions. The fullness of you is love, and it is a great sensation to let that light shine a little more gleefully each passing day.

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