Thursday, December 29, 2016
The old, and the new!
I find it funny how in the beginning of a year we tend to be so full of hope, full of energy, feeling strong enough to move mountains should it come to it to achieve our dreams...to keep crossing things off those resolution lists. And by the end of the year, when it is time to sit down and measure how far we've come we are left powerless, lacking much motivation and positive light over it all, we raise our shoulders, twitch the corner of our mouth and conclude that it is, what it is.
Rarely do we measure our emotional evolution. Just weighing progress by the seeming reality around, the tangible, the attainable. And it took me 28 years to realize that I have been going at it in all the wrong directions, taking score far too soon.
And yet there are moments when I feel like standing in front of the mirror of Erised (I clearly overdosed on Harry Potter audio-books during those pre-holiday work nights) seeing that which I truly wish for in life, not only for myself, but for the world around me, and the world in general. I used to chase away these moments, but I now close my eyes and allow myself to dream. Even just for a little while. It is important not to escape reality, but reality can only be altered by believing in our dreams, so those silent moments of allowing our imaginations to show us the way is that which expands the universe.
And those dreams stem so far from one another, because on the one hand I hope to one day grow most of the food I consume, live happily with a loving human and tiny humans together with cats and dogs saved from the streets, learning something new each day, slow and steady without societal pressures, and on the other hand I hope to travel the world with a backpack, help children in need and just live from one day to the other trusting that each day possesses everything one needs to exist. Which life is for me, between those two? Which of those two very different people am I?
At the very same time.
And only time will tell which it the stronger voice within.
So for now I rest calmly, knowing that when the time is right to act, I will know it in my heart. And until then I am praying for a miracle.
Dear friend, I hope you had a great year so far, and you will not rate it according to what went down during 2016, but who you have become as a result. I wish for you to greet the new year ahead with curiosity and the courage to enliven those fierce and beautiful dreams from the depths of your heart and to know when the time is right for action.
I wish you love.
From my heart to yours.